Sports Camp

My two oldest kids went to an all week sports camp. I was excited for them because it would be an opportunity to explore different sports they haven’t played yet. What I didn’t expect was that it was also an opportunity to overcome some social challenges.

My 7 year old daughter E and 5 year old son C were really excited to go to camp at the start of the week. They had to prepare their things and be there for most of the day. We did some swim camps last year where they had a lot of fun, so it was high hopes going in.

The first few days were relatively uneventful. That’s a good thing as a parent and they came home tired. They were learning how to play different sports like volleyball and they even knew what a setter was when I was trying to find the word for that role on the volleyball court. Midway through the week, there were some challenges.

Apparently during a few of the games, some of the other kids were not following the rules. E was trying to get everyone to play by the same set of rules. There was a back and forth with one of the girls and that girl ended up crying. This is something I did not know when E was recapping her day. She was proud of herself for using her force to let others know to follow the rules of the game. I was proud of her too.

The next day at camp, the coach pulled my wife aside during drop off and let her know about the crying girl. My wife had no context about the situation and thought that it was really out of character for E to make someone cry. My wife said she would talk to E about it to make sure everything was fine and there was not a behavioral issue for E.

When we talked to E after camp, she said she had a terrible time. The coaches were treating her very differently like she was at fault, they didn’t let her tell her side of the story about what happened, and the girl rallied some others to be mean to her and C. They said things like if E did not let them all cut in front of her, they would all be mean to C. E stuck up for herself and C and said they couldn’t cut and they shouldn’t be mean to anyone. She tried her best to be brave and do what’s right, but it took a toll on her. She didn’t want to go back to camp for the last day.

I kept reinforcing how proud I was of her to stick up for herself and her little brother. It’s not easy when you feel like the whole world is against you, but sometimes doing the right thing is not easy. My wife also said the same thing and encouraged her to go back to camp for the last day. It’s good to face some adversity and friction and learn how to solve the problems that are in front of you. A lot of the problems require communication and it’s important to practice that especially when you feel like there’s a lot of pressure. That way, you’ll learn how to deal with the situation when things are not going well.

With some teeth pulling, E agreed to go back for the last day. She actually ended up apologizing to that girl and made everything better with the coaches. The last day she said was fine and that she actually played with everyone. E and C made some friends and even though it wasn’t the best experience for them, they both felt like they enjoyed parts of it. I also felt like E took som big steps to learn how to deal with conflict. As a parent, that by itself made the camp worth it.