One or Two

My 1 year old son L hasn’t been taking no for an answer recently. He does not want to listen, especially when he really wants to do or hold something. It’s all part of their development, which I am all too familiar with, but it is still hard to reason with a 1 year old before they start melting down.

Luckily, we had a breakthrough where some communication was getting through to him. I would just need to explain things a few times using simple words and L would understand most of what I was trying to say. If he wanted to bring all his toys in the car, I would tell him that it was too much. We would drop or lose them, so he would understand.

Then came the negotiations where he would ask for one or two. He had two hands and realized he should ask for two things to hold. At first, I always insisted on one thing and he would agree. I felt like he was happy just getting something that he wanted. Then came more negotiations where one wasn’t enough. If I agreed to one, he would then turnaround and ask for two. He just kept saying two until I agreed, which I ended up doing if I was trying to hurry out of the door.

I guess it is a good thing that L pushes the boundaries (just like my 7 year old daughter E and 5 year old son C did when they were little). He doesn’t accept the world as it is and uses his little voice to shape it. Inside, I don’t mind that they negotiate or push the bounds a little bit because that’s what they need to do when they grow up. Ask politely, give some reasons, follow up, and hopefully get the right outcomes for them. It’s all a process I had to learn as an adult and lucky for them, they can start much earlier!